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Thread: F2P Games Can Suck It

  1. #1
    Plane Touched
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    Default F2P Games Can Suck It

    I don't understand why freeloaders crap their pants over free to play games.

    Allow me to educate those of you that praise F2P games on a regular basis, or base your future purchases - or lack thereof - on whether a game is F2P or not.

    First, it's called a business model. These companies didn't suddenly decide to be charitable. They realized, thanks to companies like Zynga (Farmville, Mafia Wars) that microtransactions are extremely profitable.

    How successful? Farmville has generated over $600 million ****ing dollars. Wait - what? Business model.

    What drives me insane is that the F2P business model is targeted at those of you that think it's the god damn cat's pajamas. They're targeting you because you're in a particular demographic. It has nothing to do with age, gender, or ethnicity. It has to do with intelligence. And gullibility. If you're high fiving the **** out of F2P companies congratulations, you just gave the CEO a blow job and a car payment.

    Here's an overview of the psychological strategy:

    They lure you in with no visible fine print. The game is free. It's absolutely free. It's so free we'll actually ban your account if you send us a credit card number. You're all "bro! I was going to spend $15 a month on this subscription fee instead of a heart attack lovers pizza! CALL DOMINOS NAO. RUNES OF MAGIC AWAITS." So you sign up.

    You run the game and you're surprised. The production values are a lot higher than you expected. In fact, this game looks a hell of a lot like World of Warcraft but the **** is ****ing free! AND THE PIZZA IS DELICIOUS.

    Then someone rides by on a god damn planet. And you're like "wait - where can I get a Jupiter mount?" That's when you notice an in-game store. Nah, you think to yourself. I'm not an idiot. I'm not about to start spending money on a F2P game. Nice try, internet!

    Eventually you level up a few times and things are going well. Sure, other people have fancy hats and swords engulfed in baby souls but they're suckers. They paid for that crap. Even better, you made some friends. And those friends want to roll through The Generic Instance and you want to go too. Then they ask if you've got a Potion of Payment. It's only $5 in the in-game store for a stack of them. I mean, these are your friends. You should go with them. It's $5. That's a combo meal at McDonalds. You can afford that.

    You just spend 1/3rd of your monthly subscription fee. Do you see where I'm going with this? Maybe you don't yet. I'll skip ahead.

    You're tired of riding around on your donkey. Everyone else is riding around on giant Twizzlers, stuffed Gandalfs, and each other. You've had it. Besides, you've invested three weeks into this game. It's worth another few bucks to finally get those medieval rocket boots.

    And you do.

    And at some point you can't take the grind from level 30 - 40 so you invest in an EXP booster. Or perhaps you purchase that sword wrapped in baby souls you saw at level 1. And you justify that purchase because you spent money before that so you have to justify those purchases. And you're satisfied.

    Now I think you get it.

    I know what you're thinking: "No Homebrew, actually I wouldn't be that guy." Yes you would. Want proof? These companies are filthy ****ing rich.

    They create games that are entertaining enough to suck you in, invest time and create social connections, then they rely on laziness, convenience, social obligations, and curiosity to **** your wallet. And it works. It works more than you'll ever admit to.

    Have you ever purchased a character transfer, name change, or pre-order for a digital item? That's exactly the same thing on a - what seems to be - more reasonable scale. So reasonable in fact, that Blizzard could purchase an island, landscape it into a ***** - if they censor that word it's a man's genitalia - and name it after you. Then fight you off with high paid lawyers. That's how much money they make from that alone.

    Now through that example I actually employed a healthy dose of the fundamental tenants of psychology. I'll give you one example that I was always fond of:

    There was a study where a group of people were divided in half. They gave the individuals from one half five dollars in one dollar bills. They gave the other half of the individuals a five dollar bill. Guess who came back with more money?

    Yeah - that's called microtransactions. The best part of this explanation is that it's not necessarily because you're gullible or dumb or uneducated. It's because it's psychologically innate to suck at mathematics in finances.

    And furthermore, it gets better. You'll spend another dollar to justify the first one you spent. Then you'll spend another dollar to justify the two you just put down. Congratulations, we're all ******ed. That's just how our brain works. And companies count on it. All those F2P companies some of you jerk off in dark alleys. They love you guys.

    In addition to everything I've already said, let's consider your demographic here.

    Say we have a pizza stand. On Monday, the pizza is two dollars a slice. How many people will show up? Well, people with two dollars to spend, we know that much. Now on Tuesday, the pizza is free. How many people will show up? A lot more, right? Hell yes. But it's not the quantity really, it's the quality.

    Whether you like it or not, and this is not my opinion - though I totally agree with it - freeloaders are not known for their exemplary academic, financial, or moral achievements. They're not typically the high-brow crowd some of us like to spend our limited existence in the company of. Yeah that's right - call me an elitist. I'll take it. I'd rather hang out with people who've read a book than those of you that still don't know the ****ing difference between "you're" and "your" and you're pushing 30 years old. That **** is just a tragedy. And no - I'm not suggesting people without money are freeloaders. I've met people with a lot of money who are worse than a homeless guy with a sign that reads "cant afford mmo sub. 85 paladin 'bout to get deleted. wtb handouts."

    You know who else doesn't have two dollars for a slice of pizza? An angst-ridden 14 year old with a thirst for blood and fattening foods. That kid. That stupid little **** that ruins every MMO conversation you've ever had in a public forum. That kid typically has to ask his parents, and if they hate him as much as I do, they'll say no. Note: they usually hate him more than I do.

    So F2P essentially offers sneaky, manipulative business models, freeloading tools and children, and content that typically mimics games it's trying to copy in order to trick you into feeling like you struck gold.

    And I get that some people don't have $50 to cough up for a new game. Some of us often wait quite a while to set aside that money. That's awesome so I genuinely suggest you're careful with your purchases. But don't tell me you can't afford $15 a month. There are around 730 hours in a month. Let's go ahead and subtract 8 hours a day for sleep and another 8 for work or school. That leaves 8 hours a day, or 240 hours on an average month that costs approximately $15 to enjoy. If you're unemployed? Go ahead and double that. We both know you're not going to get 8 hours of sleep either if you don't have a job or go to school.

    Great, so you can't afford 240+ hours minimum of gaming for $15 every month but you can totally afford to go see Sex in the City 2. Get your god damn priorities together.

    In a nutshell?

    F2P Games Can Suck It
    Last edited by Homebrew; 02-08-2011 at 11:06 PM.

  2. #2
    Rift Disciple
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    ^^ what he said.

  3. #3
    Soulwalker
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    Thumbs up true :D

    lol very very nice post xD and i couldnt agree more.

  4. #4
    Rift Disciple nfmus's Avatar
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    Somebody has a case of Riftdrawals.

    Very well said and I couldn't agree with you more.

  5. #5
    Plane Touched
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    Thanks for the props. And yes, I am having "Riftdrawals." I already miss that game. Beta in about seven days. That's a really, really long time.

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    Rift Chaser Rolien's Avatar
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    I agree on everything except the grammar part =p Some of us are not the best with spelling or grammar heh.

  7. #7
    Soulwalker
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    Thank you and so True. I play LOTRO and I have found it so annoying. I am hating the game since F2P. That is why I am moving here.

    Faldiin

  8. #8
    Shadowlander Frogs's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Homebrew View Post
    You know who else doesn't have two dollars for a slice of pizza? An angst-ridden 14 year old with a thirst for blood and fattening foods. That kid. That stupid little **** that ruins every MMO conversation you've ever had in a public forum. That kid typically has to ask his parents, and if they hate him as much as I do, they'll say no. Note: they usually hate him more than I do.
    Ouch, harsh stereotype. But putting myself in an adult's shoes forces me to agree.

    Nice thread, made me chuckle and spreaded some truth. Even if the truth was put into language as harsh to the eyes as goatse.
    żLOLQUE?

  9. #9
    Plane Walker Anakha's Avatar
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    Well said. Now if people could actually listen....
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  10. #10
    Plane Touched
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    Quote Originally Posted by Homebrew View Post
    I don't understand why freeloaders crap their pants over free to play games.

    Allow me to educate those of you that praise F2P games on a regular basis, or base your future purchases - or lack thereof - on whether a game is F2P or not.

    First, it's called a business model. These companies didn't suddenly decide to be charitable. They realized, thanks to companies like Zynga (Farmville, Mafia Wars) that microtransactions are extremely profitable.

    How successful? Farmville has generated over $600 million ****ing dollars. Wait - what? Business model.

    What drives me insane is that the F2P business model is targeted at those of you that think it's the god damn cat's pajamas. They're targeting you because you're in a particular demographic. It has nothing to do with age, gender, or ethnicity. It has to do with intelligence. And gullibility. If you're high fiving the **** out of F2P companies congratulations, you just gave the CEO a blow job and a car payment.

    Here's an overview of the psychological strategy:

    They lure you in with no visible fine print. The game is free. It's absolutely free. It's so free we'll actually ban your account if you send us a credit card number. You're all "bro! I was going to spend $15 a month on this subscription fee instead of a heart attack lovers pizza! CALL DOMINOS NAO. RUNES OF MAGIC AWAITS." So you sign up.

    You run the game and you're surprised. The production values are a lot higher than you expected. In fact, this game looks a hell of a lot like World of Warcraft but the **** is ****ing free! AND THE PIZZA IS DELICIOUS.

    Then someone rides by on a god damn planet. And you're like "wait - where can I get a Jupiter mount?" That's when you notice an in-game store. Nah, you think to yourself. I'm not an idiot. I'm not about to start spending money on a F2P game. Nice try, internet!

    Eventually you level up a few times and things are going well. Sure, other people have fancy hats and swords engulfed in baby souls but they're suckers. They paid for that crap. Even better, you made some friends. And those friends want to roll through The Generic Instance and you want to go too. Then they ask if you've got a Potion of Payment. It's only $5 in the in-game store for a stack of them. I mean, these are your friends. You should go with them. It's $5. That's a combo meal at McDonalds. You can afford that.

    You just spend 1/3rd of your monthly subscription fee. Do you see where I'm going with this? Maybe you don't yet. I'll skip ahead.

    You're tired of riding around on your donkey. Everyone else is riding around on giant Twizzlers, stuffed Gandalfs, and each other. You've had it. Besides, you've invested three weeks into this game. It's worth another few bucks to finally get those medieval rocket boots.

    And you do.

    And at some point you can't take the grind from level 30 - 40 so you invest in an EXP booster. Or perhaps you purchase that sword wrapped in baby souls you saw at level 1. And you justify that purchase because you spent money before that so you have to justify those purchases. And you're satisfied.

    Now I think you get it.

    I know what you're thinking: "No Homebrew, actually I wouldn't be that guy." Yes you would. Want proof? These companies are filthy ****ing rich.

    They create games that are entertaining enough to suck you in, invest time and create social connections, then they rely on laziness, convenience, social obligations, and curiosity to **** your wallet. And it works. It works more than you'll ever admit to.

    Have you ever purchased a character transfer, name change, or pre-order for a digital item? That's exactly the same thing on a - what seems to be - more reasonable scale. So reasonable in fact, that Blizzard could purchase an island, landscape it into a ***** - if they censor that word it's a man's genitalia - and name it after you. Then fight you off with high paid lawyers. That's how much money they make from that alone.

    Now through that example I actually employed a healthy dose of the fundamental tenants of psychology. I'll give you one example that I was always fond of:

    There was a study where a group of people were divided in half. They gave the individuals from one half five dollars in one dollar bills. They gave the other half of the individuals a five dollar bill. Guess who came back with more money?

    Yeah - that's called microtransactions. The best part of this explanation is that it's not necessarily because you're gullible or dumb or uneducated. It's because it's psychologically innate to suck at mathematics in finances.

    And furthermore, it gets better. You'll spend another dollar to justify the first one you spent. Then you'll spend another dollar to justify the two you just put down. Congratulations, we're all ******ed. That's just how our brain works. And companies count on it. All those F2P companies some of you jerk off in dark alleys. They love you guys.

    In addition to everything I've already said, let's consider your demographic here.

    Say we have a pizza stand. On Monday, the pizza is two dollars a slice. How many people will show up? Well, people with two dollars to spend, we know that much. Now on Tuesday, the pizza is free. How many people will show up? A lot more, right? Hell yes. But it's not the quantity really, it's the quality.

    Whether you like it or not, and this is not my opinion - though I totally agree with it - freeloaders are not known for their exemplary academic, financial, or moral achievements. They're not typically the high-brow crowd some of us like to spend our limited existence in the company of. Yeah that's right - call me an elitist. I'll take it. I'd rather hang out with people who've read a book than those of you that still don't know the ****ing difference between "you're" and "your" and you're pushing 30 yeras old. That **** is just a tragedy. And no - I'm not suggesting people without money are freeloaders. I've met people with a lot of money who are worse than a homeless guy with a sign that reads "cant afford mmo sub. 85 paladin 'bout to get deleted. wtb handouts."

    You know who else doesn't have two dollars for a slice of pizza? An angst-ridden 14 year old with a thirst for blood and fattening foods. That kid. That stupid little **** that ruins every MMO conversation you've ever had in a public forum. That kid typically has to ask his parents, and if they hate him as much as I do, they'll say no. Note: they usually hate him more than I do.

    So F2P essentially offers sneaky, manipulative business models, freeloading tools and children, and content that typically mimics games it's trying to copy in order to trick you into feeling like you struck gold.

    And I get that some people don't have $50 to cough up for a new game. Some of us often wait quite a while to set aside that money. That's awesome so I genuinely suggest you're careful with your purchases. But don't tell me you can't afford $15 a month. There are around 730 hours in a month. Let's go ahead and subtract 8 hours a day for sleep and another 8 for work or school. That leaves 8 hours a day, or 240 hours on an average month that costs approximately $15 to enjoy. If you're unemployed? Go ahead and double that. We both know you're not going to get 8 hours of sleep either if you don't have a job or go to school.

    Great, so you can't afford 240+ hours minimum of gaming for $15 every month but you can totally afford to go see Sex in the City 2. Get your god damn priorities together.

    In a nutshell?

    F2P Games Can Suck It
    oddly enough i spent 60 bucks in a month playing RoM for pretty much the reasons you stated. the whole reason i wanted to play a f2p game was to avoid a sub. boy did i self pwn myself. any way word on the forums is a quite a few people in that game spend thousands of dollars a month.
    Last edited by Zeropride; 02-08-2011 at 10:04 PM.

  11. #11
    Ascendant Vyxagallanxchi's Avatar
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    This is I think the funniest post I have read on this forum thus far. Took me a good 10 minutes to get through it all with how hard I was laughing.

    I played a F2P game a while back, every SINGLE thing you say is true. The game I played sold lottery items in the cash shop, pay $1 and have a .05% chance to get gear, a 99.95% chance to get tokens used for random crap that you could buy from other players for like... 100 ingame coins... (one mob kill). And people spent THOUSANDS of dollars on these lotteries. And these lotteries became a monthly occurance. Why? Because these people were so willing to pay the companies vacation expenses. And then... there was one even WORSE then that. The ultimate weapons in the game cost roughly 35 thousand dollars, or 20 something years of nonstop farming. Yeah. Guess what? People actually spent $35,000 on it (And so you know it's not a typo, thirty-five thousand). Thankfully, I saw that and said "screw it" to F2P games very early on.

  12. #12
    Plane Touched
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    Quote Originally Posted by Zeropride View Post
    oddly enough i spent 60 bucks in a month playing RoM for pretty much the reasons you stated. the whole reason i wanted to play a f2p game was to avoid a sub. boy did i self pwn myself. any way word on the forums is a quite a few people in that game spend thousands of dollars a month.
    I feel you. I know I'm abrasive but I do sincerely understand that people with intelligence get sucked into the business model as easily as slingblade. I should have mentioned that these companies aren't typically employing idiots to make their business decisions.

    The last company I worked for employed a woman with a PHD in psychology to head up the user behavior department.

    They get you. They know you. And they spend millions of dollars to make sure you spend a lot more money than you think you will when you register.

  13. #13
    Plane Touched
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vyxagallanxchi View Post
    This is I think the funniest post I have read on this forum thus far. Took me a good 10 minutes to get through it all with how hard I was laughing.

    I played a F2P game a while back, every SINGLE thing you say is true. The game I played sold lottery items in the cash shop, pay $1 and have a .05% chance to get gear, a 99.95% chance to get tokens used for random crap that you could buy from other players for like... 100 ingame coins... (one mob kill). And people spent THOUSANDS of dollars on these lotteries. And these lotteries became a monthly occurance. Why? Because these people were so willing to pay the companies vacation expenses. And then... there was one even WORSE then that. The ultimate weapons in the game cost roughly 35 thousand dollars, or 20 something years of nonstop farming. Yeah. Guess what? People actually spent $35,000 on it (And so you know it's not a typo, thirty-five thousand). Thankfully, I saw that and said "screw it" to F2P games very early on.
    Thanks. I figure if I'm going to go off on angry tangents I might as well be colorful in my explanations.

    In terms of your experiences, that's not surprising. At the end of the day a sad quantity of gamers in these "free" environments spend a hell of a lot more money than they would on a $15 per month basis where the only thing you pay for is a hotel when your wife throws your stupid *** out for neglect.

  14. #14
    Rift Disciple
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    Yep! Go do a search on NewEgg for a specific product or item. Guess what ads pop up on IE next time you log on. Everything you do online is for sale to someone.

  15. #15
    Ascendant Belenos's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Homebrew View Post
    I'd rather hang out with people who've read a book than those of you that still don't know the ****ing difference between "you're" and "your" and you're pushing 30 yeras old.
    OP, your post is so much epic win, that I ROFLed for a solid 10 minutes straight. You are RIGHT ON the money. I sincerely hope this thread does not get locked, because even though you had some choice words in there, it does not get any more "straight from the hip" than this. It should be a mantra.

    If you are wondering why I only snipped that one part out... I am sure you will see it soon.

    Post of the Day award from Belenos
    Last edited by Belenos; 02-08-2011 at 11:02 PM.

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